Mar 21 2009
When Did Feminism Go Wrong?
I’ve had a brief chat with IG ringing in my ears for days. In essence, we were discussing how some subjects could only ever be discussed with certain people. Of course, this subject was sex - the un-PC kind.
It all began when I saw ‘The Watchmen’ and declared to everyone how I’d basically throw my beloved sister under a bus for the chance at hot & sweaty debauchery with Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s ‘Comedian’. Dude is wrong - dude is so wrong on every level that there’s no way anyone could ever justify his actions. Yet, he has to be the sexiest on-screen bad-boy I’ve ever seen!
<a href=”http://s86.photobucket.com/albums/k87/spookyyank/?action=view¤t=watchmen_comedian.jpg” target=”_blank”><img src=”http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k87/spookyyank/watchmen_comedian.jpg” border=”0″ alt=”Photobucket”></a>
Sure, what I’m talking about is fantasy and not the longing to “land” a bad-boy. That was one of our first laughs during the chat - women want the bad-boy yet are horrified when he’s bad. Sorry, but the bad-boy is good for one thing and one thing only - cheap and meaningless sex. The kind of sex that no one would ever call love making. The kind of sex, that if done right, would lead to pulled muscles, some bruising and possibly a wickedly shameless trip to the ER for a stitch or two.
So, you see where this is going. It is the 21st Century and women have been free to lead their own lives, create their own worlds, smash the mold of preconceived notions and unapologetically spend too much money on shoes. Yep, we can do whatever we want unless it breaks a feminist rule. And, trust me, lusting after a murdering rapist breaks a rule!
But, my question is why? The Comedian is an extreme example and I’d actually prefer and hope that Jeffrey Dean Morgan is the good guy he seems to be. Though, realistically - the guy who wears all three names -
Usually a serial killer.
Anyway, has anyone else ever questioned the crazy that feminism has become? Generations of women have fought and for what? So some group of judgmental women can decide what we can or cannot do? To decide what is “proper” for us and what isn’t? Doesn’t that go against the very foundation that feminism was built on? Wasn’t the whole point of it to free women to a life that is 100 % of their own design?? So, doesn’t that make the so-say pioneers a bunch of dominating and controlling men??
It’s so sad to me that we claim to be liberated while allowing others to control how we think and what we desire. Yes, there are boundaries. No woman should ever stay in an abusive relationship even if they love the guy. No woman should ever degrade herself to please a man. And, no woman should ever feel that she needs to apologize for wanting something others find unappealing. Some might even say there’s a fine line, but there really isn’t. A woman can only be degraded by a sexual position or circumstance if she doesn’t actually want to do it. Yes, that is degrading. But, ya know - if your thing is to be bound and gagged while you watch your partner touch himself to a Beyonce video - that’s ok! If you only ever want sex when all the lights are out, the house is empty and your parents are in another time zone - that’s ok, too!
The bottom line is that to hold onto this puritanical notion of what all women should want or what all women should be is insulting and we really should knock it off! And, it’s absolutely nuts to me that I should ever need to censor myself because someone would actually be appalled that I once had sex so intense that I was left with bite marks on my neck, finger shaped bruises on my shoulders and unable to turn my head for three days! It’s also nuts that I should ever feel the need to hide my lust for a fictional character in a movie!
Hell, you know what I say? I say “handcuffs and butt plugs for everybody!”
